Still wondering...

I haven't pursued this blog because I realized that there is no real concept behind it. Is it a blog about homeschooling? Or do I want to write about my micro-mini suburban homestead? Sewing, granddaughters, teaching English, reading, all of these are vital to my life and occupy my thoughts. How do I incorporate all of those into one cohesive blog? Or should I choose one or two aspects only to focus a blog around?

Until I can come on board with a real idea for a blog with a clear focus I will probably be ignoring this blog. I hope to come up with a new blog soon that will be a reflection of who I am today and will be both an interesting place to visit and a good place in which to write.

Microfarm

Earlier this morning I went out to do my "farm chores." It is ridiculous how much I enjoy taking care of my 4 chickens each day and accomplishing other outdoor jobs. Each morning I take some kitchen scraps to the chickens, give them clean water and check on their food supply. Then I fill food bowls for the dog and cat and drop off the remaining kitchen scraps in our new compost bucket. Soon I hope to get some seeds and starts in the ground in our square foot garden boxes.

This morning while I was out there I noticed two sparrows squabbling in the oak sapling near the chicken coop. They were either mating or fighting for territory directly above my head. It was quite a show and even though I am not thrilled with non-natives making themselves at home in our yard, I enjoyed their presence. I love seeing the natural world function as it was intended, while I go about my day. I think I am in charge of ordering my days, but the orderliness of wild animals routinely acting out their roles in nature without my help or interference, reminds me that I'm not really in charge.

I am in charge of my tiny suburban "microhomestead" though, as much as anyone can be. To be surrounded by sparrows, chickens, oak and birch trees, and empty boxes waiting to be filled with growing food, fills me with pleasure. The projects we have started, such as composting, raising chickens for eggs and planting fruit trees, gives me a sense of order as well as a wonderful anticipation of the future production we expect from this yard. I am delighted that I still have a small yard where we can try growing our own food and compost. With a yard at our disposal we can still take advantage of natural sun and wind to dry our clothes. At this moment, that is way more than enough.

The Scent of A Dinner

Mmm...roast chicken in the oven, slathered with crushed garlic, pepper, salt and a dusting of Italian seasoning. Tucked inside are chunks of fresh onion and fennel bulbs are nestled up next to the wings. I hope this bird is as succulent and tempting as it smells right now. Some brown rice pilaf or fluffy biscuits, along with some tender steamed asparagus, will complete the meal. To my husband, if you are reading this, it's all for you, babe.

Abundance

I'm listening to "Worthy is the Lamb" from Handel's Messiah. It's lovely to listen to this and nothing else. The house is still because everyone else is off slaying dragons today. Oldest son is working, middle and youngest sons are attending Bible class and Dad is teaching. Today is one of Dad's unpaid days off from work so he's free to correct math papers at school before he teaches class; then the afternoon is at his disposal.

Thinking about these free days that my husband suddenly has, I asked him last night if he feels laid off when he has to spend an unpaid day away from work. His response was a typical, "I don't know." That response tells me that he hasn't thought about it much, and instead he's putting one foot in front of the other until there's a clear change in plans. That is also typical of him. He gets things done and he doesn't spend too much time trying to figure out his emotions. Hmm...I might try that one of these days.

Whenever I think about how much more emotional I am than my husband, and how much time I spend analyzing my feelings, I remember Shelly Long in the long running t.v. show Cheers. She tried to justify her obsessive analysis of emotions by telling her boyfriend Sam that "the unexamined life was not worth living." Since she played a literate, pretentiously erudite woman, her application of this quote to her somewhat hapless life is hysterical and reminds me not to take every darn thing about myself so seriously.

Serious or silly, anxious or complacent, we'll muddle through today and wait on God for the future. If it doesn't rain today we'll work on planter boxes this afternoon, and I'll make pizza for lunch. Most of all, we'll try to remember that abundance is not just found in material things.

This is what I see

It is amazing to watch my daughter, so young herself, parent her own small brood. She is filled with grace, wisdom and patience most of the time. She has compassion for her children and often puts aside her own needs to minister to the needs of her family. She is 21 and she has a husband, a toddler, and a newborn. She is training to be a La Leche League peer counselor. She has endured two pregnancies with hyperemisis gravidarum.

In contrast to my daughter's life, other young people choose to live together without marriage because they are too young to make that kind of commitment. Or they choose to end a pregnancy because they don't believe they are responsible enough to care for another human being.

I would compare my daughter's depth of commitment to those strong young men and women who enter the military and put their lives on the line to serve others or to those who go on missions trips or decide to become career missionaries.

Are young adults, 18-24 years old, for instance, just too young to handle such mature commitments? Is it wrong to allow them to jump into life's biggest challenges at a young age? Should we bless their decisions or beg them to stay children for a bit longer? Should we "punish" with a baby girls who become pregnant outside of marriage?

I believe many young people are ready to step into full adult roles at an early age. I see the evidence in the family which my daughter is founding with her young husband. She was not punished with an unwanted pregnancy-she and her husband chose to marry and then chose to begin having children. If she can do this, what else can young people do that we are often afraid to let them try?

Don't mistake me, though. My daughter has no idea of shrugging off her marriage if it gets too tough. She made a full, permanent commitment. The 18 year old who signs with the Army or the Marines has made just as deep a commitment to willingly lay down his or her life to defend the United States. In four years a soldier can move on, it's true, but during that time of service the commitment is complete and the possibility of losing ones life is as serious as the wedding vows.

Yes, I believe that some young people should be blessed for choosing to be career missionaries, getting married or joining the Army at an early age. Not all of them are ready, nor have all of them been prepared, but we should remember Paul's exhortation regarding Timothy, who advised his fellow Christ followers not to despise Timothy because of his youth. Let us not despise these wise and responsible men and women because of their youth. Let's love and encourage them instead.

New Grandchild

The new grandbaby has arrived and I am happy to announce that I now have two grandgirls. They are both delightful, clever, and curious and altogether lovable. I get to visit them again next week. I can't wait to snuggle up with them on the couch and read "I'll Teach My Dog 100 Words" repeatedly.

I didn't expect to have grandchildren so soon but I am enjoying every moment. They stir the heart more deeply than I imagined. It's quite a drive to see them, so I'll never get to spend as much time with them as I'd like, but the joy is that we always seem to pick up our relationship right where we left off when we're together. I can hardly wait to discover who Granddaughter #2 will turn out to be.

Wait, hope, watch, pray

I'm in front of a window which overlooks the ocean. I've been here on the north coast since
Tuesday, waiting out baby's arrival. My daughter has her "team" in place-Grandma to keep her 2 year old happy and safe, a friend to coach her labor and Daddy to hold her hand, rub her back and love her through labor and delivery. We're praying that today's the day. Since this little family lives a bit out of the way, it's not easy to reassemble the team at short notice. So if I do pick up any readers today who are inclined to pray, please remember us here as we wait to meet the our new family member.

babies and pregnancy

I'm waiting for a baby. Been waiting for awhile now. My daughter is expecting a baby any day now and is showing lots of signs that it's nearly time, but God's timing is perfect and ours is not. So we wait and pray and hope that today's the day.

I made marvelous bread yesterday. What a delight to learn a new skill which allows me to reproduce quality bread at home in just a few minutes. I highly recommend "Artisan Bread in Five Minutes A Day" by Jeff Hertzberg and Zoe Francois.

I intend to fully enjoy this week of vacation. The family is home today and housebound by the heavy rain. It will be a great day to get some lesson planning done for upcoming weeks. Tomorrow I'm on a trek to the North Coast to visit my granddaughter and break up my daughter's last week of pregnancy. Next weekend, if all goes well, we'll work on our square foot garden boxes and perhaps add to our flock of chickens.

I hope everyone(and both of my readers) enjoys the week, sunny weather or wet.

Seriously?

I just mixed together the dough for the basic bread recipe in "Artisan Bread in Five Minutes a Day" and my first thought is, "Seriously? This is going to work?" It sits for two hours at room temp now and then goes in the fridge. It really can't be this easy, can it?

My second thought is that I need Twitter, for dumb little comments like this.

Rain, rain, come again today

We've finally had RAIN. Here in California we've been holding our breath for rain and waiting for water restrictions to kick in if the rain didn't come. With the amount of rain we've had all over the state this week I'm "cautiously optimistic" that our water supplies will be reasonably replenished this year. The best news is the large amount of snowfall, which provides the runoff for water supplies later in the year.

I would love to think of a way that this connects to homeschooling, but it's Saturday morning at the beginning of a week long break from school and I just can't seem to go there. My head is full of bread recipes and chicken questions-it's time to add to our flock-so I'm off to do Saturday things.

And now for my high wire act

Today is the day. I am going to try one of those famous no-knead bread recipes that are floating around on the web, at the local bookstore and in the newspaper. These recipes promise to help you easily fit bread baking into your routine while giving you the most incredible bread you've ever tasted. Hmm...not bad hype. There may be more of a knack to it than that, considering all of the sites devoted to the intricacies of no-knead bread making I've seen. But I'm willing to give it a try since I'm a pretty good baker and bread baking has taken up plenty of my time lately. Once I've taken the plunge I'll report the results here.

I think to myself, "I just want to write." But I wouldn't mind getting paid for it, thank you very much. That's where Writer Mama by Christina Katz comes in. I stumbled on this book at my local independent bookstore early last year. Despite the excitement I felt reading the book, I was still reluctant to consider some of Ms. Katz' advice at the time, even though she made free lancing sound so possible. According to"Writer Mama," much of the work of a free lance writer involves researching markets and promoting yourself. In short, being a free lance writer sounds an awful lot like being an independent business woman, a role I never envisioned for myself.

I picked the book up again just the other day and realized that I'm ready to take Ms. Katz' advice much more seriously now. What has changed? The economy, for one thing, has changed significantly and supplementing our income would be welcome. Another thing that's changed is that I have gained some personal confidence while teaching English to 8th graders at my sons' coop school.

Additionally, I have become an avid blog reader. Reading blogs of women like me who are raising a family, homeschooling, and writing has been pretty inspiring. The message these women c0nvey echoes Christina Katz' in "Writer Mama." A woman who decides to work at the craft of writing, and promote her writing with dedication, can and will be published and in many cases will be paid for her work. Is it time for me to be one of those women?

We had the most beautiful, windy, chilly day yesterday. It was one of those days when the sun contends with clouds until it bursts into shafts of pale golden light which highlight the landscape. It was really my favorite kind of day.

We had a productive homeschool day. While I baked bread(incessantly, it seemed) the boys worked on homework. My seventh grade son took many backyard breaks to discover, invent and bang on the house(?) while my 10th grader slogged through a number of assignments, in between important phone communication. As I said, we're relaxed in our approach. But in the end, all our work was completed, four lovely loaves of bread were baked and all of my class prep was finished. A good day.

How we homeschool today

In case someone accidentally stumbles on my blog and -gasp-reads it I think I should explain how we homeschool today.

I used to be a homeschool mama to four children, all of whom learned at home. We all worked together on projects or we all sat around reading books aloud and called it good for the day. It's amazing how many subjects can be covered by read alouds. We were active in homeschool support group that provided structure to our homeschool year by holding annual events like spelling bees and science fairs. We did lots of field trips and went to park day on Fridays. To me, this was homeschooling. I always wanted to be a more diligent, creative and structured homeschool mom, but most days I was just next door to an unschooling mom. Somehow, my oldest two children survived and became educated, thinking people.

That was then. Welcome to this morning and the new homeschooling. My two younger children no longer have the blessings of park day and science coops organized by whichever mom was the most motivated. Many homeschoolers in our area have banded together to create something like a school that meets three days a week and hires teachers. Most of the teachers in the school my boys attend are parents of students, but a few are not. I teach English and History to a group of 7th and 8th graders, including my son. Now my sons have formal homework assignments, grades and GPAs. The pattern of our days is much more like that of families where conventional schooling is the norm.

The difference between our family and the public school family across the street is that we wake up on Monday morning, shuffle into the kitchen for coffee and then get started, eventually, on the homework due on Tuesday. While the boys work on assignments I record grades and write out teaching plans for my classes. My youngest son and I still spend Monday afternoons at an organic gardening homeschool coop, but only if he has his homework done for school. In addition, we still have time to pursue our passion for living history as Civil War reenactors, which we'd be hard pressed to keep up with in conventional school.

Somewhere in between conventional school and totally relaxed homeschooling now suits us perfectly. We like the structure of going to school three days a week and we like the days in between when we can work at our own pace. My boys benefit from doing more reading, writing and note taking than I previously asked of them. I benefit from teaching subjects I love to groups of students and from earning a small paycheck. This style of homeschooling is the best way for us now, just as the independent homeschooling we did in earlier years was the best for our family then. I still sometimes miss the old way and the old friends who've moved on, including my oldest children, but I've realized that this time with my youngest children is priceless and fleeting. For as long as it lasts, I am content.

Baby girls

When I open my laptop each morning I see the grimacing face of the most beautiful girl in the world. And that little sweet potato face, growling into the camera, lights up my day. The face belongs to my granddaughter and I'm over the moon about her. Most of the time she doesn't growl-she has a sweet personality and a kind heart. But even her scowls and pouts go straight to my heart.

It's funny how different being the grandma is from being the mom. When my own daughter was the same age her pouts and strong will didn't seem so endearing. Instead I took those moments as challenges and a reminder to help her learn self control. I didn't know at the time that I loved those moments as much as the sunny ones. But now I look at my granddaughter testing her parents and showing her willfulness and somehow it brings on nostalgia and love and compassion. I feel sad for her when I know she has to endure discipline, but I also know that the end of it all will be a strong, lovely young woman, just like her mom.

My Bloggy Debut

Finally, some soggy weather has arrived. Time to snuggle in with a pot of soup on the stove and some bread for dinner rising in the oven. Wet weather always gets me in the mood for cozy things like these and a favorite "teacups and rain" movie like "Pride and Prejudice."

For my 16 year old son, however, wet weather is a call to action. I'm sure his earliest homeschool memories must involve putting on rain boots and floating foil boats down the stream in the gutter. Now that he's older he feels compelled to gather up a group of friends for football at the park when the first raindrop falls. Busily texting all his friends he mutters, "What's wrong with people that they don't want to play football in the rain." Sheesh, I'm sure I don't know.